OK...So I was looking and I realized that I hadn't updated this since Christmas...and yeah I felt like I have some time now...and I am stressed any way so this gives me something to work at...Um I don't know where to start really...so I guess the least of my concerns is a good place...I guess that woud be school tomorrow I have a midterm in my conputer class...but I have been working at the practice tests and made the best sheet of notes that we are allowed to have possible...beyond that i have been making A's in everything...I spend a large amount of time on school work...when I get neverous I tend to work on what i can...so currently I have almost finished all the hw for the entire semseter in my econ class...and I am three weeks ahead in my spanish....yeah that should be an indication of how things are going...I don't want to focus on what it going wrong so I focus on work...

Lets see...I love my friends I really do...but there is one that is driving me crazy...He really is a nice guy...but at the same time he is more emotional than most of my friends that are girls...he tends to text me late at night and has sort of panic attacks...and prior to this he would text another friend of mine...and then he started talking to me and found that i better relate to his situation and basically I tell him what he wants to hear so now he texts me...and It isn't all bad...its just there are times he can be horribly moody and I do tend to take things personally...like he fell asleep at our friends house...and woke up freaking about a nightmare I guess he had...and when he drove me home he got to laughing and I thought he was feeling better but then when we got to my house he wouldn't give me a hug like he normally does...and that was a little dig...I don't know sometimes he just makes me feel like he is using me...but hes still a friend to me...I guess that sounds odd...

Um....hmm I have been performing on and off again...that completely stopped for a little while when people that I use to know started coming out of the cracks...they knew the person that taught me magic and all had an opinion they were more than willing to voice...but when they started talking I guess I just shut it down... They weren't what I needed...then after a while I started hearing for them...I waited some more time and just recently picked it back up...

Someone really important to me recently had shit happen...to be completely honest know one knows enturely what happened...but he ended up under basically medical observation...he isn't doing very well but they have done everything that can be done....hes really sick...and there is just allot going through my head and allot of things I am not ready to face with it...I mean they only thing they can really tell me is best case senario is that he will make it but there is a high chance he might lose his vision...but I guess right now I am just hoping he makes it...hes been in my life for a really long time and he is one of the people I can't imagine not having in my life...so I guess that is where the mass majority of my mind is...

I guess the one good thing is that one of my good friends has invited me to go with her family to vegas again this summer...I am looking forward to that...she is amazing and we are going to see criss angel...I am really excited for that...I feel bad because I feel like I haven't been able to express it like I should...but she is awesome...

And...with spring break just around the corner I am looking forward to seeing some of my friends...I mean most of time will be with my friend who is sick...but I know he wouldn't want me to just shut my life down... plus he has other friends that want to come see him...so yeah...my sis is coming from out of state and I can't wait to see her...and a friend from another college wants to see me...so hopefully its a good distraction...

thats really it for now...it kind of depressing but that is just what is going on now...